What's it like having lunch at the Best Restaurant in the World?

There are few experiences where my skills as a writer are seriously put to the test, and this is one of those times. Even searching for a title to this post was difficult. I tried 'Visiting the Mozart of Food' , 'I will never be able to look at lesser foods again' and 'I am a lucky bastard and you all should hate me'. I think the last one is closest to the truth, but it makes for a horrible title.

My friend Russ worked with a chef now working at the Fat Duck. This is a Michelin 3-star restaurant with a two-month waiting list, and justifiably voted Best in the World in a recent survey. And I knew this all beforehand, so when Russ called me as a last-minute replacement to attend his birthday lunch, I naturally jumped at the chance.

I had managed to play second fiddle in a little plan which turned out to be one of the most excellent days of my life. I have been to a few Michelin starred restuarants many times, as well as many other unrecognized restaurants of similar calibre. With all the travel I do on expenses, I get to visit a wide range of restaurants all across the world, so I think my credentials as someone who can appreciate fine food are well-established.

So how does one quantify food - such a qualifiable experience? Certainly, quality of the raw ingredients and preparation is the foundation of quality, simple cooking. There are few things more pleasurable than simple food, done well with quality ingredients. Great food takes that base and adds preparation, service and accompanyments (sauces, deserts, wines, etc.) The Fat Duck was another level entirely. The menu is filled with such oddities as snail porridge, mango and douglas fir puree, and smoked bacon and egg ice cream. Each dish greets you with unexpected tastes, colours and interactions that are quite unlike anything I've ever had before. Some courses almost brought tears to my eyes and my delice of chocolate made me positively giddy with laughter.

There was no greater joy than to share my dishes with my friends and multiply our collective taste experiences. Scott had poached sea bass with generous helpings of lovely truffles. Russ had a fantastic leg of lamb, and most dishes came with some culinary foreshadowing to clense and prepare your palette for the next course.

The well-deserved moniker 'Best Restaurant in the World' is not simply an acknowledgement of the success and novelty of his methods, but also the fact that Heston Blumenthal actually knows what he's doing and the food is worthy of praise given to him.

I had:

Taittinger Champagne to start (as a complement for Russell's birthday from Sam)
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NITRO-GREEN TEA AND LIME MOUSSE
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ORANGE AND BEETROOT JELLY
OYSTER, PASSION FRUIT JELLY, HORSERADISH CREAM, LAVENDER
POMMERY GRAIN MUSTARD ICE CREAM, RED CABBAGE GAZPACHO
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SNAIL PORRIDGE
Jabugo Ham, shaved fennel
Sanserre with our starters
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CARROT AND ORANGE TUILE,
BAVAROIS OF BASIL
BEETROOT JELLY
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CRAB BISCUIT
Roast foie gras, crystallised seaweed, rhubarb and oyster vinaigrette
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Shiraz with our mains
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SADDLE OF VENISON
Celeriac, marron glace, sauce poivrade
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DÉLICE OF CHOCOLATE
Chocolate sorbet, cumin caramel
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Tokaji Desert Wine with our deserts
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MANGO AND DOUGLAS FIR PUREE
Bavarois of lychee and mango, blackcurrant sorbet, blackcurrant and green peppercorn jelly
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LEATHER, OAK AND TOBACCO CHOCOLATES
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Calvados as a digestif